Love struck, love bombed? It can break your heart. Picture iStock It’s an all-out assault on the senses, on feelings and sexually.
Love Bombing is an emotional blitzkrieg that can leave persons on its receiving end seduced, used, tossed out and badly scarred. It is one of the most seductive yet insidious forms of dating, according to medical doctor and psychologist Dr Jonathan Redelinghuys. “Love bombingis a manipulative tactic where a person showers their partner with excessive affection, gifts, and compliments at the start of a relationship,” explained Dr Redelinghuys.
“It might seem like a fairy tale, but its purpose is to make the victim emotionally dependent.” Love Bombing overwhelms its target and was first associated with the American charismatic religious movement, the Unification Church in the 1970s. Contextually, the organisation used tactics of excessive flattery, admiration and other “blowing smoke up the rear-end” manoeuvres to recruit and retain members. It has morphed into a clear relationship strategy in the twenty-first century.
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“Love bombers are often controlling and possessive. Once they’ve succeeded, they can use this emotional dependency to control and manipulate,” warned Dr Redelinghuys and noted that signs of love bombing may include constant communication, excessive compliments, grand gestures of love, and a rapid escalation of the relationship. “They may proclaim their love too soon, always want to be around you, and pressure you to commit prematurely,” said Dr Redelinghuys.
“When things are moving too quickly, and the romantic intensity feels overwhelming, it’s essential to take a step back and evaluate,” said Dr Redelinghuys. He cautioned that love bombing could lead to a toxic relationship that leaves the victim feeling emotionally drained, less confident, and paranoid. Yet all new relationships have strong elements of all the telltale signs during courtship, and it could be challenging to differentiate between being love bombed, or simply wooed. “It’s essential not to confuse love bombing with the honeymoon phase,” Dr Redelinghuys explained.
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